Have you ever been to that point in your life when you think you just had too much. There’s so many things that need to be done you just wish you were a kid again when the bulk of your responsibilities was just playing with your toys and probably the occasional chore.
Well, I have. And after much thought I decided that the best possible way to approach this growing problem is to just get rid of it. Be reckless. Do whatever you want. Abandon responsibility.
Think about it. Without your responsibilities, you no longer need to worry about keeping a stable job to pay the rent or put food on the table. You no longer have to worry about gaining weight or losing weight. No more thoughts about deadlines, budgets, bills and all those other crap which do nothing but complicate your life. Quit your job! Squander your savings! Simplify life!
Lose all the stuff you thought you need like the television, the radio or the washing machine. Throw away your cellphone! Delete your Facebook and Yahoo accounts! Be the man that nature intended you to be, the hunter-gatherer kind of man which doesn’t worry about education, social responsibility, human rights or any other of those garbage!
Your responsibilities are only adding more weight to your increasingly tired and stressed out mind. Without responsibility there would be no problems, so abandon responsibility today!
Every once in a while I still go into this emo (short for emotive or super ultra emotive) state which gets me in the mood for songs which sing about how horribly depressing life is. It doesn’t linger. Not since I discovered some new bands whose songs greatly redefine emo. The lyrics are a long way from optimistic but their riffs and hooks and their overall music are generally just too catchy and upbeat. I don’t know what works for you but to me, it’s a good way to get out of my sad and sorry emo-ness and go happy hardcore for the rest of the day.
While Fall Out Boy and Panic! At the Disco’s songs are great for this purpose, let me introduce you to their fellow label-mate and equally rocking band: The Academy Is… (no seriously the ellipsis is part of their band’s name and not my emo way of ending sentences). I like them because their songs are catchy, that’s it. End of story. I don’t care about how they can really capture the true meaning of heartbreak or how you can really feel the anguish in their lyrics, personally I think being sad is a choice and I hate being sad so I choose not to be. Now, anger, as destructive as it may be, gets results better than being perky or morose and I consider it a way to move things along, you know, shake things up a little bit. But I’m talking about The Academy Is… and not about how ridiculous it is to be emo so let’s move on.
If you like the musical stylings of Fall Out Boy or the borderline histrionic vocals of Panic! At the Disco, then I recommend The Academy Is… which is basically a combination of both. I once saw this online forum that compared FOB, P!ATD, Paramore and some other emo band with TAI. The verdict was unclear but who cares? To me their music takes me away from being sad and that’s a good thing. I think the reason why these bands write and sing these songs about love, loss and hate is so you, the listener, won’t have to. Just listening to them release is a kind of release for you too. So it’s therapeutic in a way.
Anyway, they don’t really fit the qualifications to be considered Rocket Powered Stuff. Actually, this is more of an FYI for those out there who are tired of girls pants and black nail polish and are really desperate to get their greasy hair out of their face. You should try out these bands and wear something happy tomorrow. It’s not the end of the world so continue living and reading my blog for more Rocket Powered Stuff from around the world!
I saw Winnie Monsod’s segment last night on News on Q about the impending mass lay off on OFWs (Overseas Filipino Workers) due to the economic crisis the world is currently experiencing. Personally, I thought her views were very hard to believe and somewhat propaganda-ish.
First off, she assured us that 80% of the total OFWs are working in Asia and that Asia is actually doing well in spite of the global financial crunch. China and Japan were unlikely to be greatly affected by this crisis and so Filipino employees in those countries were relatively safe, compared to those who are working for the US or UK. Also, the Middle East, she reports, were showing promising signs of continuous growth and, consequently, our workers there have nothing to worry about. Well, I’ll believe that when my father, who’s employed in Saudi Arabia, finally reassures us that he is safe in his job. There have been rumors in his company of a mass lay off and he’s worried he might be one of those to be let go. This is just like the government to tell the people everything is okay when clearly there are certain things that we need to look forward to and prepare for.
Serbisyong Totoo better begin telling the very real danger OFW families are facing or they’re going to be in for the surprise of their lives.
Next, she also reported that, in case she was incorrect in her predictions, the Department of Overseas Labor and Employment (DOLE) is more than prepared to handle the re-integration of workers who could face the chopping block back into the foreign job fair. She told us that there are thousands of other employment opportunities abroad that the DOLE can dole out for those who were sent back to the motherland. I had to temporarily change the channel because I just couldn’t handle all the bullshit I was being fed but I promptly put her back on again because I was curious to learn more.
Her most disturbing observation of all, the one that led me to doubt her PhD, was when she said Filipinos (just Filipinos), in particular, have high chances of retention with their jobs because of the “malasakit” (compassion) we constantly show our employers. Well it sure makes for a hard decision whether to fire Juan dela Cruz or not especially since he’s so nice to everybody. Screw the global crisis. I am keeping this pleasant employee and I’m replacing everyone with robots who doesn’t form unions and doesn’t demand a raise all the time.
In the face of the economic dilemma the world is facing, how could she possibly think that compassion would play a vital role in the OFW’s struggle to keep his or her job? The entire segment reeks of government propaganda to prevent massive panic amongst the millions of families whose dinners and lifestyles depend on a relative working abroad. I’m going to give Mareng Winnie a chance, though, because I like her. But Serbisyong Totoo better begin telling the very real danger OFW families are facing or they’re going to be in for the surprise of their lives.
I think I’m old enough to know that sometimes, no matter how much we plan things to go a certain way, there’s always a chance that it won’t. There’s always something that gets in the general way of our plans. It could be some small overlooked detail in the preparation, an unexpected event that takes precedence over the current state of things, or it could be some drunk A-hole who decided to take a piss on your new pair of shoes, but whatever obstacle fate sends our way, I’ve also learned that nine times out of ten, there’s nothing we can do about it but accept it and find a way to get around it. I have looked forward to several things I planned for the past weekend and, as always, the disappointments were disappointing, the frustrations were frustrating, and my moods were supernaturally annoying.
My brother and I were supposed to have a one-on-one match last Sunday, the showdown that was always meant to be: Defense of the Ancients! I looked forward to it because I really thought my brother was good at the game and I was so excited that I can finally have someone to face me besides the usual AI, which after several weeks gets so predictable and boring. So anyway, three hours, four rounds, and thirty-three embarrassing losses later, I got bored because my brother turned to be such a weakling. I thought when I finally faced my brother on a DotA battle, it’d be exciting. Oh well, Mai was right, victory is boring.
Meanwhile, the little girl I’ve been tutoring at Math came by while my brother and I were out playing at some computer shop deep in the heart of Dasmariñas. I didn’t think she’d come over because it was a Sunday night. Apparently she did, and so I missed her. She’ll be back tomorrow, I know she will. Besides, when I agreed to her mother when she asked me to tutor her at Math I didn’t give guarantees about my schedule. My conscience is clear.
By the way, I think I need to share this abysmal Math textbook that little girl has. She’s eleven years old and she’s studying in one of those mushrooming private schools all over the rural world. I’m helping her with fractions and when I took a look at the book the school issued her, I thought it was as helpful as a spoon for slicing. The instructions were plainly too confusing for any eleven year old to understand. It was like, “In dividing fractions in mixed form, we take the whole number and divide it by the other number from the dividend. The quotient should be equal to the product of the divisor’s numerators and the reciprocal of the dividend’s denominator… etc.” Ever get this feeling that its textbooks like these which make studying so goddamn fun? Me neither. No wonder, Filipino children are getting dumber and dumberer every year. It’s so ironic that the textbook which was supposed to make a kid smarter is making the same kid feel a hell of a lot dumber. And the blame goes to the scholars who write these books as testament to their scholarly scholarliness, instead of as tools to help un-scholars make it through a single day at school learning something new. I forgot the name of the author and the publisher but don’t worry, I’ll put it up next post so you guys can stay away from it, or burn it, whatever you think is fitting for garbage like that.
Those scholars are the reason why I don’t ever want to be successful. At least not in the way most people view how success should be. I just want to find something that I enjoy doing. You know that old saying that goes, find a job you enjoy doing and you’ll never work a day in your life? I’m really betting all my luck on that. Unfortunately, I had to cancel my job-finding expedition the next day because when I called Shenna in the morning, she was sick like I was. She has had a cold which was turning to be a really severe cough and she just couldn’t make it. That was a little bit disappointing, because I was really looking forward to it. I even printed my resume on scented paper and everything! (Not.) And to top it all off, yesterday, my mother and my sister went to Cainta for a visit and when they got home they brought with them some of the stuff I left there except one. You guessed it, they didn’t bring my Superman shirt with them.
Disappointments add flavor to life. Without them, life would be fast filled with people’s success stories, it’s going to be nauseating. So hooray for disappointments and keep on reading for more on My Life in Exile.
I have recently decided to exile myself to a remote village in Cavite for selfish reasons. I had a room in Cainta, Rizal but I locked it up and packed my bags so I can be here. I wanted to get away from all the influences around me in the city, I figured if I remove all these things I would know who I am better and know myself better I did. For example, I have been living with the knowledge that I can’t reach my toes while my knees were straightened out, apparently I can and I just wasted all these years depressed because I was the only boy in PE who couldn’t. But I’ve come to discover more important things than just that and I’m not going to talk about it. Because as soon as I knew myself better I bored me so I decided to think about my future instead.
I want to be a writer. A really good writing writer. I have an idea for a novel that I want to write and so far I have started working on it. Right now it’s still inside my mind but self help books (which I’m not going to plug because they’re not paying me) say that knowing what you want to do is step one of having a clear future. So I’m on step one. It took me several weeks to take that step but the old Milo slogan says great journeys begin from a single step, or was that Confucius? Anyway, it doesn’t matter because I took it and that’s that. You can expect plenty of updates about this on following posts.
When I left Cainta, I took most of my clothes with me and left the other bulky stuff like my dresser and my TV because it’s such a hassle to ride the bus with those things with you. Unfortunately, I also left my old clothes in there (the dirty ones which I never got around to washing) including my favorite Superman shirt. I don’t like Superman. I just like that shirt because it’s blue and that’s my favorite color. I found out it wasn’t with me two weeks after I got settled in my new house in Cavite and oh boy was I mad at myself. I was riding my bike one day through the fields and it just hit me like Invoker’s Chaos Meteor: “Where’s my Superman shirt?” I went back to Cainta but I met my old friends and we went out and they weren’t gracious enough to remind of it so when I got back to Cavite, I realized I left it again.
During the past few weeks I was writing something for the Graphic/Fiction awards because I needed an excuse to look busy so I wouldn’t have to do household chores. I wrote something two years ago about the old Filipino legend of the fireflies and I thought it was good enough to be submitted but it was around 8600 words and there was a 7000 word limit to the contest so I tried to cut it short which was a complete waste of a good three weeks. Then I wrote a new story about an anti-social fairy and a manic-depressive boy in Marikina but that was over the limit too so I scrapped the idea. Then I showed my friends something I wrote one disturbing afternoon while I was listening to Coheed and Cambria’s song, Mother Superior, about a guy killing his best friend and they liked the homicidal story better than my other attempts so I ended up submitting that to the contest. The story was so R.L. Stine I’m not even anxious to win.
Then I made a new resumé for myself which was pretty embellished so I liked it. I’m planning to work at some coffee chain and I’m going to use that to get in.
Wish me luck!